13th July 2017: Romance
Most of my life I have never questioned the power of Romantic Love. It didn't matter if someone told me that it was an invention and humans should probably be Poly-amorous and more logical about the whole thing. It hasn't mattered that I see very little evidence for it really working out for that many people; I hold out for the mythical friend and passionate lover rolled into one.
I've been binge-watching a lot of the Philosopher Alain De Botton and imagine he's kinky (he has a gorgeous mouth), but that's another story. He earnestly explores the subject of Romanticism with humour and logic and points out that it has set very unrealistic ideals for all of us.
He argues that this kind of ideal usually involves having a a soul mate and we will find this person 'by instinct' rather than the traditional marriages of 'reasonable criteria'. The old reasonable criteria put practical concerns first, whereas the Romantic movement was highly emotionally charged and all sexed up. Check out Alain and his great mouth on any youtubey thing and you'll immediately wish for the simplicity of marrying someone for a farm.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPOuIyEJnbE
In addition to watching many youtubey things with Alain De Botton, I've just finished reading Caitlin Moran's fictional story 'How To Build A Girl' and it is utterly brilliant. I am saying 'utterly brilliant' in homage to Rik Mayall and I know Moran would understand.
I think all people, especially teenage boys and girls, should read Moran's take on this coming of age tale. I laughed out loud more times than I could count, and I got tears in my eyes twice. When you read it you'll understand why I'm bringing it up in the context of romance. It's the kind of book you have to write little comments about in the margins. The most romantic connection her protagonist has doesn't involve sex at all - it's about being recognised or understood.
As for romance, it's not just about sexual love is it? It's that walk in the woods or the way the bird moved. It's about feeling utterly content on a Friday night and feeling no fear of missing out when I'm home with a hot water bottle and soup. That could be love. It feels like love. I take notice of what I feel for I must be a Romantic.
I'm only 46 and I have all that I need and even some of what I want. The cat breathes and the rain continues to fall.
Most of my life I have never questioned the power of Romantic Love. It didn't matter if someone told me that it was an invention and humans should probably be Poly-amorous and more logical about the whole thing. It hasn't mattered that I see very little evidence for it really working out for that many people; I hold out for the mythical friend and passionate lover rolled into one.I've been binge-watching a lot of the Philosopher Alain De Botton and imagine he's kinky (he has a gorgeous mouth), but that's another story. He earnestly explores the subject of Romanticism with humour and logic and points out that it has set very unrealistic ideals for all of us.
He argues that this kind of ideal usually involves having a a soul mate and we will find this person 'by instinct' rather than the traditional marriages of 'reasonable criteria'. The old reasonable criteria put practical concerns first, whereas the Romantic movement was highly emotionally charged and all sexed up. Check out Alain and his great mouth on any youtubey thing and you'll immediately wish for the simplicity of marrying someone for a farm.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sPOuIyEJnbE
In addition to watching many youtubey things with Alain De Botton, I've just finished reading Caitlin Moran's fictional story 'How To Build A Girl' and it is utterly brilliant. I am saying 'utterly brilliant' in homage to Rik Mayall and I know Moran would understand.
I think all people, especially teenage boys and girls, should read Moran's take on this coming of age tale. I laughed out loud more times than I could count, and I got tears in my eyes twice. When you read it you'll understand why I'm bringing it up in the context of romance. It's the kind of book you have to write little comments about in the margins. The most romantic connection her protagonist has doesn't involve sex at all - it's about being recognised or understood.
As for romance, it's not just about sexual love is it? It's that walk in the woods or the way the bird moved. It's about feeling utterly content on a Friday night and feeling no fear of missing out when I'm home with a hot water bottle and soup. That could be love. It feels like love. I take notice of what I feel for I must be a Romantic.
I'm only 46 and I have all that I need and even some of what I want. The cat breathes and the rain continues to fall.
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